Mobius Online 2

Wow, what a good idea for a title, huh? XD JK

This story will contain violence, language, dialogue, and mild sexual themes. It is also told in the viewpoint of a girl. Ironic, huh? A guy writing a story starring a girl. But don't get any ideas. There will also be a few guest appearances from MO2 characters! Yay!

Prologue: A Saint? Or A Sadist?

It was about twelve years ago, when I saw a fight, ten years when I experienced getting beat up, and probably six or seven years when I got into my first fight. I wasn't really that much into the whole violence scene, but when I was being physically harmed, I knew when to defend myself. Of course, one day it went too far. I fight broke out, I was in it, there was punches being thrown, hits being taken, and the one part I used to hate: blood. I was petrified when I saw blood. My mom and dad and even my doctor helped me with my hemophobia, but I just couldn't get over it. And then, there was a year ago...

I had encountered blood... And I liked it... But, after this change I had realized that I wasn't the girl that I used to be... No longer was I the helpless little girl being pushed around all the time. I was a fighter... with malicious thoughts.

168 words.

Work on that.

Otherwise, I never judge stories by a prologue or first chapter. There's nothing blatantly horrible, though. However, I'll refrain from any criticism at the moment to avoid nitpicking.

That was just the beginning. The rest of the story is gonna be in script. I was just putting the Prologue in book format. Anyways, here's Chapter 1.

Chapter 1: Why I Hate School

Patrice: Come on, you're gonna be late!

Shika: Ugh, coming... *walking up the stairs* Geez, why can't they just teach you for at least half a day? I mean, seriously. Sitting in rooms 'til 3:45 pm? I'd tease the teacher for no reason until I got out. After all, high school is were all the sleazeballs, douchebags, and roid monkeys are. And if they try to mess with me, hmph. They're on their own.

Patrice: Well, I understand your means of self-defense, but just relax. I know it's our freshman year, but we'll be out on Friday and we can relax about high school a bit.

Shika: Relax? You're kidding, right? How can someone relax in a jungle like this? I mean, one time, a guy got his face slammed into the locker by a football player when he let his guard down. And THAT'S why you must always stay cautious. Remember when that damn jock was pulling your pigtails and cut them?

Patrice: ...I'd rather not...talk about that right now. *the bell rings* Uh-oh! Come on, let's go! *she drags Shika to World Geography*

Shika: Hey! Let go of me! *they enter the classroom*

Mr. Bausch: Hmph. About 7 seconds late to class. You two are getting quite tacky with your timing. You should come not even one second late, but on time. I'd even be happy for once if you came to class early! But, seeing this is the last week of school, I will let you off the hook. Now, go to your seats.

Patrice: Yes sir, Mr. Bausch. *walks to her seat, along with Shika*

Mr. Bausch: Now, today, we'll be watching a movie, but the class gets to vote. You have a choice of The Romancer or Let Loose and Let Go. The Romancer? *10 students raise their hands* Let Loose and Let Go? *the majority of the class raises their hands* This one it is. *puts in the movie*

Shika: Alright, something that won't be boring... *15 minutes later* Zzzzzzzzzzzzz...

Patrice: Shika. Shika, wake up. Shika! *shaking her* Wake up!

Ah, now that's why I don't judge stories by the first thing posted.

I despise script form.

The only real criticism I have is... Try to make the dialogue a bit less stiff.

Also, length.

That's all I got.

Okay, then...

Chapter 2: Who, or What Am I?

*in the dream*

Shika: Huh... Another dream. Why does everything feel all... dark and eerie? *fire comes out of nowhere* !? What the hell? What's going on here? *a mysterious guy shows up, going through the fire*

Mysterious Guy: Hello, Shika . I've been waiting to talk to you in person.

Shika: Wh-who are you? And what's going on here?

Mysterious Guy: I don't think it matters who I am. I'm just a person who wanted to talk to you about a very important matter. I've come to talk to you about something within you...

Shika: ...within? What do you mean within?

Mysterious Guy: I'm saying that you have a special power inside of you that lies dormant as of right now. I want you to join me.

Shika: No way! Why would I? Besides, you creep me out.

Mysterious Guy: If you come with me, you can awaken your true potential and become stronger than you could ever imagine. People will kneel before you, and all of your enemies will fall... if you join me...

Shika: Forget it...

Mysterious Guy: Suit yourself... *disappears* Muhahahahahahaha...

Shika: Who was he...? *the fire circle closes in on her* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!

*out of the dream, she wakes up* GUH?!

Patrice: Shika! Are you okay?

Shika: It's nothing... Just a nightmare, that's all.

Patrice: Oh... Well, you were shaking a lot, plus you were really sweating up a storm... I was just worried, that's all.

Shika: Don't worry. Everything will be alright. *the bell rings* Well, I'll see you later. Gotta go to gym, woohoo! *runs down the hall*

Patrice: ...okay... (But I was just kinda scared, that was all...)

Chapter 3: They Will Find You

Shika: *grunt* Gotta get these *grunt* ankle weights on... *click* There we go. Now I'm rea--

Coach Wrangler: *blows her whistle* Shika, in my office, now.

Shika: Sigh... *walks in* Yes, coach?

Coach Wrangler: I have a record of your performance in this class for the whole school year, and I have to say...

Shika: *thinking* (Oh crap, she's gonna say I just half-assed it, isn't she?)

Coach Wrangler: ...you are simply exceptional! *tosses the papers* Seriously, in all my years, I've never seen a freshman who's performed at the same rate as a senior, let alone a sophomore! You have pure talent-- no... Pure potential! Imagine how great you'll do in your junior year! You'll be the greatest! As a matter of fact, I requested that there would be a trophy for the top student in my class, and I haven't given it out yet, so it's kinda dusty, but now I can polish it and give it to you!

Shika: ...you can't be serious... ME!? The holder of the Top Student trophy?

Coach Wrangler: Yeah, but I get a new one every year, so it's not anything special. Anyways... *hands her the trophy*

Carla: HOLD IT! HOLD EVERYTHING! STOP THE DAMN PRESSES!

Shika: Oh crap, the cheerleader queen...

Coach Wrangler: What is it now?

Carla: What do you think it is, Coach Wrangler? I, like, totally deserve that trophy, you know. Besides, who coordinates the other cheerleaders?

Coach Wrangler: You do...

Carla: And who is the one to help the football team when they're about to lose?

Coach Wrangler: You are...

Carla: And who's the most prettiest, sweetest, coolest girl in the whole school?

Coach Wrangler: You are...

Carla: And who's the one who'll--

Shika: ENOUGH ALREADY! Seriously, no one likes it when you act like a sassy broad around them, Carla, and you might've been the cheerleading queen, the prom queen, the prettiest girl in the whole school, but no one likes your crap, okay? So, you have a choice: shut that mouth of yours, or let me knock those teeth loose.

Carla: *scoff* Excuse me? Did you just talk back to me?

Shika: Yes I did, and what are you gonna do about it?

Carla: *slaps Shika* Never, EVER make the mistake of taking back to a famous senior, ever.

Coach Wrangler: Girls, please!

Shika: Oh no, this girl is gonna get it... *slams Carla in the face* Obnoxious tramp!

Carla: *gasp* You... hit me!? *starts crying* I can't believe you'd do that to me... *runs away crying*

Coach Wrangler: ...

Shika: My philosophy: lick me, I'll lick you back. No questions asked.

Coach Wrangler: I'm just gonna pretend that I didn't see that, and just give you the trophy.

Shika: Thank you. *takes it* Well, off to the gym! See ya, coach.

Coach Wrangler: *just waves as she looks in shock*

Mysterious Guy: *standing outside of the window* Well, well, we've found her... I guess if she won't come to us, we'll just take her with us... *on a headset* Okay guys, let's get her! *five guys bust through the windows, an alarm sounds off and the girls run to the locker rooms*

Shika: *drops her trophy* Wh-what the hell? *gets grabbed* Ahh! What's going on?

Mysterious Guy: You're coming with us.

Henchman 1: Don't ask any questions or tell anyone.

Henchman 2: You'd be wise to listen.

Shika: *kicking and screaming* LET ME GO! LET ME GO RIGHT NOW YOU-- *gets gagged*

Mysterious Guy: Okay, let's go! *they run toward the chopper as they leave the gym*

Coach should've done something, i guess. I dont think someone would willingly let girls fight, and....be a girl.
everything else looks fine.

He makes it seem like a surprise that there's a trophy he can give out, then right away says he gives one out every year.

Also, any school staff on earth would have stopped that fight before it started.

"You have pure talent-- no... Pure potential!"
Those words are not relevant to eachother at all...

And I still hate script form.

4Right...

Chapter 4: Place That I Don't Know

Shika: *gasping* Wha-- where the hell am I?

Mysterious Guy: You're in a room, seperated from everyone else.

Shika: Room? I don't see anything... *the lights turn on* Whoa... That's bright. Could you turn it down a tad bit, please? *sees an android* What's that?

Mysterious Guy: That is a prototype of one of our synthetic cyborgs, K-Tara. She's a well-equipped fighting machine, plus if you underestimate her, she will take you down. Better be careful, Shika...

Shika: Okay, now I'm mad... This whole thing is starting to piss me off! Who the hell are you!?

Mysterious Guy: You shall find out soon enough. *the intercom turns off*

Shika: Fine... I guess I have no choice. I'll have to fight. *the android turns on* Come on then, you piece of fodder.

K-Tara: *eyes glow yellow* Initiating attack formation. *goes into an attck stance*

Shika: *cracks her knuckles, then charges at K-Tara* AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!! *hits her in the head* ...Ouch! Dammit, what did they make this thing with? That thing is painful to punch...

K-Tara: *grabs Shika's arm, then bends it* You cannot defeat me, inferior fox.

Shika: *escapes K-Tara's grip* Geez... That hurt... But that won't stop me. *launches at her and does a corkscrew kick*

K-Tara: *gets pushed back* I see... So you're not weak... But you still don't stand a chance. *punches Shika in the gut*

Shika: Gwaaah! Ugh... *dizzy, gets grabbed by K-Tara*

K-Tara: This is it, fox. Game over. *squeezes Shika's neck*

Shika: (I'm so screwed... I can't let it end so early... I have to find out about that guy... I won't lose!!) *bites K-Tara's arm*

K-Tara: Resistance is futile. Accept your-- *arm freezes* What? How can this be? *Shika is freed*

Shika: *a blizzard forms around her* RAAAAAAAAAAH! *slams her fists into the ground and an icicle pierces through K-Tara*

K-Tara: Impossible... *splits in half and explodes*

Shika: *gasping* (Was that... my potential?)

Mysterious Guy: *over the intercom* Excellent job. You'll make a fine addition to our fighting league:

Shika: Come on already. Just get me out of here and show me your face.

Mysterious Guy: Very well. Do you really wish to find out?

Shika: Do you really want me to hurt you?

Mysterious Guy: I'l take that as a yes. Let me introduce myself. I am the head of this league, Fighters' Union. I find the best fighters all over the world to let them compete against each other so that I can find the best fighter and challenge them myself...

Shika: You didn't answer my question. Who are you?

V: My name is V. Just V. And nothing more.

Shika: Okay then, thank you. Now could someone GET ME OUT OF THIS DAMN ROOM!?

This should be a funny one, yet probably explicit because of the shower scene. As long as it doesn't disturb you, it's fine with me. Also, a new character! Yay! Plus, I was watching Trogdor while making this chapter, so if you don't like Trogdor, sorry. Just don't say that to Strong Bad. He'll summon TROGDOR THE BURNiNATOR to burninate you. XD LOL

Chapter 5: Make Yourself at Home

V: Congratulations on your performance today. Tomorrow, there will be a competition, and I want you to be a part of it. But for right now, take a rest and get comfortable.

Shika: Okay... (But I'm not sure about the comfortable part.) So, where's the showers? *walks around, looking for the showers*

*meanwhile, back at the school*

Patrice: *outside the school* Shika? Shika? Where'd you go? Oh no, I hope nothing bad happened to her... *calls Shika on her phone* Hello? Shika?

Shika: *her phone rings* Ugh... Another call. Minutes aren't free for me... *answers the phone* What is it?

Patrice: Shika! Thank goodness, are you okay?

Shika: Patrice? What is it?

Patrice: Do you know what was going on? I heard there was something happening in the gym, so I thought you got hurt...

Shika: Well, uhhh... I, uh... Listen, you kinda caught me at a bad time, okay? I'll call you back later, okay?

Patrice: But, Shika! *call ended*

Shika: *groans* Got to get to the-- *hits a door, it reads "shower room"* Yes! The showers! *opens the door and rushes in, bumping into someone*

Perry: Hey, watch it! *sees Shika* Oh, sorry there, I didn't see you. Wait, I don't think we've met. I'm Perrier Weinhauser.

Shika: Huh? Oh, I'm Shika. Shika Okamitsu. Nice to meet you.

Perry: Sorry for knocking you down like that, are you all right? *grabs her hand*

Shika: Uhh... *blushes* (Wow, he's a gentleman... None of the boys at my high school would treat me this way!)

Perry: *helps her up* Where you on your way to the showers?

Shika: Yeah--

Perry: Okay then, I'll just let you have some privacy. *steps out of the way* There you go.

Shika: Okay, thanks Perrier.

Perry: Please, just call me Perry.

Shika: *waves at him, blushing* Oh my goodness... Did I just blush in front of him? Oh well, I'll just take my mind off this whole fighting business and relax a bit... *steps into the shower and takes her clothes off, then turns the water on* I really do miss Patrice... Why was I brought here? Why'd they take me here? *sees the hidden camera in the wall* AGH! *falls out of the shower* What the hell? When was that there? What kind of perv puts a camera in a shower room?

Perry: *talking through the door* I almost forgot to tell you, some other guy in there punched a hole a long time ago, and they were never able to fix it.

Shika: Yikes... Must've been a giant. But still, that scared me... Why did it have to be in the shower, though? People can't tell if there's a camera in there!

Perry: No, there's no camera.

Shika: Thank God... *steps back into the shower and finishes washing, then turns the shower off* It's too bad I didn't bring any clothes.

Perry: *pokes his head in* You done?

Shika: Yeah...

Perry: ...no change of clothes?

Shika: *rolls eyes* Yeah. Stupid me, huh?

Perry: *thinking* Follow me. I'll loan you some clothes.

Shika: Okay... So, your room is...?

Perry: Room 216A.

Shika: Room 216A? Well, mine is Room 243B. I'm somewhere around you then!

Perry: *opens the door, and rummages through his closet* Here. A jacket, a pair of jeans, some high-top shoes, and my favorite Trogdor shirt. Protect that shirt, it's my favorite one!

Shika: You're a fan of Trogdor?

Perry: Yeah, and the Butthole Surfers. Remember the song "Who Was In My Room Last Night"?

Shika: Yeah, I'm a fan of the Beastie Boys and other stuff. But I like Trogdor, too. Isn't that odd?

Perry: *laughing* Yeah. Well, I'm pretty weird, too.I used to think that green eggs came from eggs laid by crocodiles, then they turned green when they got cooked. That's strange, ehh?

Shika: *laughing* Well, it was nice talking to you. I'll see you tomorrow! Bye!

Perry: Bye! *waving as she leaves*

Shika: *blushing again* Wow... He IS a gentleman... He even loaned me his favorite t-shirt. It's kinda funny that a guy would give a girl a Trogdor t-shirt, though. *opens the door to her room, then closes it*